Well, the jeans had to come off. There was just a little too much constriction happening there, even after wearing them a few hours. I did find an old, grungy and highly worn out pair to put on. Sex-ay. We'll try the new pair another time. I was off to do a little yard work anyway. Which I like to do, because I actually do enjoy activity in general. Usually. Especially on days as beautiful and sunny as this one was. The only problem was, after a whole winter of sedentary slothfulness? I am really out of shape, woefully so --and I think I could feel every single bit of my 100 or so (100? Really??? Yikes.) excessive poundages as I tramped around out there in my big yard, moving sticks and logs around and transplanting. Not a particularly enjoyable sensation -- that general 'heaviness', especially when I'm actually trying to get something accomplished. But at least it was an affirmation of why I'm trying to get a few out-of-control habits UNDER control, and maybe even some resolution to at least one (of several) unresolved issues in my life. And, perhaps the excess weight helps burn more calories during physical activity? I'm just saying (because overall? I'm actually trying to avoid that whole diet mental mindset if I can help it -- I do believe it's a trigger for me) ....
It's funny how I can sometimes forget how big I've become though, until I recieve a friendly little tap on the shoulder like that. I mean, 'Hel-LO! You weigh a helluva lot, girlfriend...!'....
No disordered eating for me today so far. Yay.
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1 comment:
Hey, you are doing a great job and I am reading everything you write. You and I could be sistas from what you described as your upbringing till now. More power to you and I am fighting the same battle everyday along with lots of people.
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